Still So Young at Heart

So here I am, sitting at work and can't keep my mind off of the things that I have learned in the past couple of days. I know that the Chronicles of Narnia is supposed to be a children's book but I have learned more about the glory and presence of God in that book than I have learned in the past five years that I have been a Christian. Learning of Aslan and his crusifixion and of his ever existing presence in even the toughest of circumstances along with his all loving discipline when the wrong path is taken is simply amazing to me. The picturesque description of God that so vividly laces my brain has me constantly looking to him and searching deep in my own soul to reveal the areas that I do not seek the glowing Lion that knows all and knows best always and will never lead you astray.

So maybe since this book has been the one thing that I have expected every other reading to do for me shows that maybe I am not as far along as I have thought I ought to be or maybe even "should be". So what I have learned: that I have not grown at the pace that I have expected myself to, that I have a whole abundance and then some of more to learn, and that my old self loves to live as a ghost in my body to haunt every action that is taken place in my daily life. If I only learned to identify it in the moment instead of afterwards. So I clearly see the need for the Lord in my life and clearly see that I rarely relinquish the reigns to Him. So here I am with a messed up back (bulging disks and pinched nerves if you do not know) and a husband with lots fo study time on his hands, which leaves me searching, searching, searching, until the very depths of my soul are revealed to me in an effort to be effortless and let God change every part of me that is fleshly. Prayers are much needed here.